Writing Your Wedding Vows: 5 Tips From An Officiant
Wedding vows are often the most anticipated—and most emotional—part of the ceremony. They are the heart of your wedding day, the moment when everything else fades away, and it’s just the two of you, standing together and speaking from the soul. With that kind of spotlight, it’s completely normal to feel nervous about writing them. If you’re staring at a blank page, wondering where to begin, you’re not alone.
When it comes to vow-writing advice, few people are more qualified than an officiant. They’ve witnessed countless ceremonies, heard vows in every style imaginable, and know what truly resonates in the moment. B.C. Officiant Dale Morrison of Wed by Dale shares thoughtful words of wisdom to help couples write vows that feel authentic, meaningful, and calm-inducing rather than stressful. Here are her five top tips when it comes time to put words to paper.
make it real
The first and most important piece of advice is to make your vows real. Officiants often remind couples that heartfelt words carry far more weight than long, polished speeches. Your vows don’t need to sound poetic or perfect—they need to sound like you. A simple way to begin is by listing a few things you genuinely love about your partner. Think about who they are on their best days and their hardest ones. What makes them your person?
Don’t be afraid to add a touch of humour if it feels natural. A lighthearted moment can ease nerves, bring smiles to your guests, and reflect the true dynamic of your relationship. Some of the most memorable vows are the ones that make everyone laugh through happy tears.
walk down memory lane
Inspiration often comes when you reflect on why you’re getting married. Think back to your first meeting, the milestones you’ve shared, the challenges you’ve overcome together, and the future you’re building. Instead of trying to write your vows in one sitting, allow them to evolve. Jot down thoughts as they come to you over time, then gather and shape them into your dream vows.
in the mood!
Setting the right mood is key. Choose a quiet, calm moment to write—perhaps with a cup of coffee in the morning or during a peaceful evening alone. Writing your vows while distracted or rushed can make the process feel forced. Give yourself the space to be present and reflective.
practice makes perfect
Practice your vows, but don’t memorize them. Saying them out loud helps you become comfortable with the words and the rhythm of your voice. Consider sharing them with a trusted friend or family member for feedback or simply to ease your nerves. On your wedding day, remember that your vows are meant for your partner. Look into their eyes, speak slowly, and allow yourself to feel the moment.
skip the phone
While phones are great for jotting down notes, avoid reading your vows from your phone during the ceremony. Technology can fail, and phones don’t photograph beautifully. Instead, choose meaningful vow books and give them to your officiant ahead of time. This ensures everything runs smoothly and looks timeless in photos.
Many officiants have vow-writing “cheat sheets” or prompts to help you get started—be sure to ask!
Putting words to paper may feel overwhelming at first, but when approached step by step, the process becomes deeply rewarding. Speak sincerely, stay true to your love story, and trust that your words—however simple—will be enough. In the end, your vows aren’t about perfection. They’re about connection, presence, and creating a moment you’ll remember for the rest of your lives. We hope that Writing Your Wedding Vows: 5 Tips From An Officiant will help you!
You are invited to Lakeside Vows!
